About MeWife to one handsome husband, momma to two precious babies, big sister to my best friend, daughter from two wonderful parents and child of one amazing God! Join me as I blog about our life and everything that it may entail. Thank you for reading :)
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Monthly Archives: August 2015
The morning following activation, I rose out of bed at 6am, and the very first thing I did was hook-up with my Cochlear Implant (I like to think it made my wife jealous!). So…. Electrical Currents-ON. This marked the first time of me having to actually turn the device on, which will be a routine every morning. As expected, it took some time to adjust to the electrical currents moving through my head, and loud noise remained everywhere until my ears and head adjusted.
I survived activation day without removing the device at all, meaning taking no breaks from the constant noise being transmitted through my head-all while being on the highest volume level: 10. Initially, I was set at volume 6 when I left the Activation appointment; I immediately set it at 10 the moment I sat in my car to drive home, and its been that way since. I was determined. I had previously made up my mind (the night before) that Day Two would be the same; I’m all in for this journey, and I’m going to do whatever it takes to get to where I need to be. My thinking: the only way to train and adapt to the sounds being transmitted is to glue the device to my head!
We now have a newborn! WAIT- Hold off on the congratulations! No, we didn’t welcome another child into the world. No, we didn’t adopt one either. No new pets, plants, or any living organisms. Just ME–born again at 28–at least I feel that way.
Why? I got activated!– finally!
AND…GUESS WHAT!? No, I can’t hear. No, my ear is not fixed. No, it’s not any better….YET.
I am now hours away from official activation! I’m ready for launch–and a successful launch (pretty please?). I’ve gotten my share of “Is your ear fixed yet?” and “Can you hear now?”–Well, I may never be fixed, but tomorrow can I at least have the privilege to answer those questions with- HECK YES!? Just a little improvement will get me rolling.
If you can’t tell, it would be accurate to state that I am overjoyed at the moment–Just place the blame on the wild rollercoaster ride that took place during my final two weeks of being turned OFF (Or blame my wife-it’s always the wife’s fault right?-kidding). So, what the heck happened? The last few weeks happened, that’s for sure. I’m not sure what angle to look at it from either- so, I went with the ‘feel-good-story’ angle simply because it kind of just made sense from my point of view-based of the upcoming changes!
To further clarify, the beauty of this is that God works in awesome mysterious ways and He did so by having a holistic impact on my family. What I personally took from these final few weeks is different from what my wife gained out of it, or anyone else. Now, I do truly believe her take on everything was the intended priority one message being delivered (and please do read about that in her post: yawns and burps),and I’m so proud of her! However, secondary messages are important as well, obviously- I am a part of her life, as are others–and who says we (others) don’t get a message too? I always try to find a little something in everything–and boy, did my failing ears get exposed over my final weeks.
It’s funny how the little, mostly unpleasant things, like yawning and burping can be totally taken for granted. This morning was the first time since last Thursday that I was able to get a good, satisfying yawn in. And of course just typing the word made me do it again. I’m writing this from the hospital, which is where I’ve been since Friday afternoon. Here’s what happened:
Thursday morning I woke up at 5 a.m because I had a training at 8 across town. So I blow dried my hair, and Eric left for work. Pretty much right after he left I began having intense chest pressure. I thought I was having either bad indigestion or beginning to get pneumonia (I had a cough and chest congestion earlier in the week, and know several people who have had pneumonia this summer). I pushed through the pain and shortness of breath and got the kids up and we headed to the babysitter. As I got moving and busy, the pain got better, or maybe I just ignored it? I made it through the training, insurance open enrollment, and went out to see my classroom. The chest pain had subsided mostly but I still couldn’t get a good breath of air and I had a persistent upper back pain. We decided that I would go to urgent care that evening, after Eric got home, to make sure nothing was coming on right before I started back to work on Monday.
At urgent care they did a chest x-ray, EKG, and had me drink this stuff that would get rid of indigestion, if that’s what it was, which I knew it wasn’t. Everything that the nurse could see came back fine. But the radiologist would look over my x-rays the next day to be sure. I knew all along that it was my lungs, but thought it may just be the early stages of an infection. Friday, around 1 o’clock, I got a call from urgent care that the radiologist had looked at my x-rays and saw that my left lung had a slight collapse. They told me to head to the ER. I loaded up the kids, with their over night bags, and met Eric and my parents there.
With the understanding that I had a slight collapse, and wasn’t having any chest pain, just some back soreness, I thought it would be a quick procedure to pump me back up, and I’d be on my way. Even driving my parent’s big red truck, Clifford, home. Oh, how I was wrong. Another chest x-ray later, showed a 50% collapse in my upper left lung. Within an hour of being there I was being prepped to have a chest tube inserted and was told I’d be in the hospital for a minimum of two days. Cue the tears and fears.
They gave me a slight sedative and numbed the location. The entire procedure was done in about 30 minutes. Basically, the chest tube suctions air out of my chest cavity to make room for my lung to re-inflate.
How can it really be the last week of summer?! Part of me is ready to get back into a routine, so I can feel a sense of accomplishment at the end of each day. The other part of me isn’t ready for the early mornings, hair doing, and new job stress. What? New job? Yes, yes!!! Well, it’s sort of new… I’ll be at the same school I was at last year, but under a different position. This year I’ll start in ESE and then move to 3rd grade in January. I am SUPER excited to be joining the awesome 3rd grade team, who I interned with last fall!!!
The wait until activation day is now just two weeks away, I will be switched ON. Now, that is a thought-who wouldn’t want this ‘super power’ ability to simply switch on/off your hearing just like your living room light switch? Nagging wife-OFF. Annoying chirping bird-OFF, Sister’s “lovely” singing- OFF. Screaming tantrum toddler- OFF. The majority of people would agree that an off switch would come in handy in those situations. But for me, at least for now, I crave to hear those things/sounds, and I’ll do my best to soak it all in beautifully and appreciate it…because honestly hearing is a wonderful creation by God.
With all that being said, I can’t help but think…”just what if I could hear as God originally designed the human body to do and none of this was even necessary?” Sure, no doubt life would have been easier. But, would it have been too easy? Would I have the work ethic I possess today? The drive I carry? etc…
My point being….Aside from being a hearing man, What kind of MAN would I have been if the script was flipped? What about husband, co-worker, boss, friend, and even a daddy? To take it a step further, who would my children be? They’ve been noticeably affected, and it has at least partly shaped who they are. For example, would my 3yr old still be an overly observant, graphic, creative, energetic, and spirited child that she is? And my 1yr old son, would he be the tinkering, observant copycat that he is? But really,Who Would I Be?